This Is Where I Leave You

This is where I leave you.  I totally stole that line from the movie, which is totally appropriate.  In the movie, the grown children were somewhat resentful that their mother had detailed their childhood sexual discoveries in a book.  And though my blog is not about ALL THAT, I have written extensively about my kids, my husband, my family.

I started writing this blog on a whim; I had a very trying day, and when Colin went down for his nap, I sat in the very chair that I am sitting in right now and wrote it all down.  I was surprised that anyone read it.  And I kept writing, and people kept reading it.  And eventually, a few people that I did not personally know started following my blog.  It was only a few people, so I did not think a whole lot about it.  But over the last year, I have had more and more views.  I think that is the goal for most bloggers, but not me; though I admit, I brought it all on myself.

The past nearly four years of writing have been entirely selfish, a way for me to work through the many feelings that accompany mommyhood.  Plus I am an oversharer by nature.  Writing this blog has become as much a part of my life as running, my own therapy.  But I am unable to write about my own feelings and thoughts without including my husband and kids.  I usually ask Mark before I publish anything that includes him, but I have never asked the kids.  When they were younger, it all seemed pretty harmless, stories of wayward preschoolers and sleep-resistant babies.  The older they get, the more I feel it is unfair to sacrifice their privacy; even if the stories I write seem fairly innocuous at the time, I don’t know how the kids will feel about it in the future.

So this has been something that has been on my heart for awhile now.  I had considered making the blog private and just allowing family and friends to read. But then, I would still be oversharing, just with people that know the kids, which is probably worse.  I rarely have time to scroll through Facebook, but today, while I waited for the kids at the dentist, I had a few minutes.  One of the first stories in my feed was a blog about why one woman decided to stop writing about her children.  My sister HATES that I think everything happens for a reason, but I kinda sorta do; I can only see one reason why THAT blog would show up in my newsfeed in the little time I had to scroll Facebook, when I have had all of this on my mind for the last couple of months.

So this is where I leave you.  Thank you so much for all of the kind words and encouragement over the years, it has meant so much.

About jillo31

I always wanted to write the great American novel. I've come to the realization that that may not happen. Instead, I'm going to write about my life as a working mom to three boys. I figure in ten years, I won't remember what these days are like. I want to record my everyday victories and struggles.
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1 Response to This Is Where I Leave You

  1. Mary Dosch Strakouas says:

    I have enjoyed your posts. But I totally understand why you are stopping. I do hope you continue to write these if only for yourself. They are providing a wonderful family history and legacy for your boys.

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